My Personal Medic
by Soroni
Summary: [Kakasaku]As Sakura tends to Kakashi's wounds, she learns that sometimes, exposure is the best remedy. Rated T for the language, and for the pairing, don't like it, don't read it. The WORLD revolves around reviews!
1. Prologue

Edit: I was being a silly monkey and forgot the disclaimer. I don't own Naruto. I also don't own the series. If I did, there would be more turtles and grapefruits in it.

**Prologue**

"Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura yelled as she burst in through the door. She was lugging a medic-kit and a handful of scrolls. "Kakashi-sensei! Tsunade-shishou told me-" She cut herself off as she saw her former teacher on the makeshift bed. Her shishou had told her that his condition was bad, but Sakura never knew how bad it was. It was all that her junior, Moegi could do to keep him alive. Hand clasped over her mouth and fighting back tears, she got to work assessing the situation.

"We have to get Hatake-san to the hospital, Sakura-senpai" Moegi gasped out, "There's some sort of poison, and that leg…" Sakura knew Moegi to be a good medic, but poison was too advanced for someone of her caliber.

"Moegi, I'll take over. Just help me out here. Udon, you're the fastest, right? Report to Tsunade-shishou, and tell her that there's a poison. Looks like code-B. Konohamaru, get back to gate duty." She commanded. Udon sulked at being the messenger again, and Konohamaru clearly wanted to stay with his Moegi, but she gave them a glare that scared both chuunins out of the room faster than a passion-struck Gai. She cringed at the bad mental comparison. She also didn't like the leader role, but things had to be done, and as their senior, she was going to see them done. As she set to work removing the poison, she vaguely wondered if Kakashi felt like this when he was leading Team 7.

**_No, you guys were probably worse. _**Her inner replied to her thoughts.

_Shut up_

Sakura quickly coagulated the vital injuries. His blood now in check, she took her gloves off and started to focus chakra to her hands, looking for the poison. Using her chakra, she ripped his shirt off and started to force the poison out.

**_God he's hot,_** Inner Sakura drooled.

_Shut up, _She commanded her Inner self again.

_**But you know he is, too.**_

_Can we discuss this some other time? _

_Great, now even my conscience is here. This is so distracting._

It was really a wonder how she ever became one of the best medic-nins in Konoha, what with all these voices in her head. She wiped the sweat from her brows. She was using too much chakra in too short a time, and her hands burned, but this had to be done fast; otherwise, the poison would spread.

_**What other time? You know you like him, now. **_

This was true. Her inner knew more about her than herself, and her conscience had better sense, both of which were somewhat depressing. Hell, they had found out that she liked the elite jounin, even before she did. She shook away the words.

_Maybe sometime when he's not on the verge of death?_

Her inner self and her conscience immediately became quiet.

_Uncanny, _she mused, _how they do that whenever anything gets serious…_

"Sakura-senpai, Do you need anything?" Moegi opened the medic kit and activated the kanji-filled scrolls.

"Yeah, anesthetic injection," Sakura kicked herself mentally for not paying attention to the matter at hand. "Then clean the leg wound." She winced as her eyes fell on the said wound. _Whatever the weapon was, it went through all the ANBU gear, and left that much of a wound? It's impressive enough that there is a wound on him, the legendary copy-nin. Well, what's more extraordinary is how he ever did get to the main gates with the poison and this…_

Focusing on the poison again, she put more pressure on the small incision, knowing too well that physical pressure wouldn't make a difference. _Dammit, you can't die on me. I swear I'll get this out and heal you, even if it takes my life. _She finally removed it. "The main part's out. I'm going to have to get an antidote in him sometime soon. Moegi, he's going to have a fever, so get ready for that." As Moegi prepared the antibiotic salve, she examined the poison. _Not half as good as Sasori's, but it's still something. Probably some half-rate Mist poison that I might be able to counter with..._

"Moegi, finish cleaning it up. I'll deal with it after." Sakura reassured. The pulse was finally normal, and after a series of hand seals, his breathing was more or less regular. She activated a small scroll, taking out an antidote syringe. She found a vein and applied the remedy. She sighed in relief now that the poison was finally under control, and went to work on the leg wound.

Moegi had done a neat job of sterilizing the wound. Sakura healed the bones first, and then moved onto the muscles. _Damn, I'm running low. If only Naruto was here, I could use his chakra. Just a bit more, and I'll be done. _

"Moegi, could you close up the wound? I'm almost out."

"Hai, senpai." Moegi started to work as Sakura slumped to the ground, feeling her energy drain out of her.

"Ano," Moegi turned around, "What do I do when I'm done?"

"Ointment, wrap it up, wait for Tsunade-shishou" Sakura muttered as Udon burst into the room. "Godaime-sama's coming, Haruno-san!" Sakura got up. "Gate duty, with Konohamaru," she ordered, checking over the wound. Moegi had done the bare minimum, using what was left of her chakra to regenerate the skin, but Sakura felt like she didn't want to leave it as it was. She could tell that the muscle tissue was still broken up under the skin and it would be painful to walk for a week. She let in a steady stream of chakra, regenerating the muscles.

_There, Kakashi-sensei. You are so not dying on me. _As her junior started to wrap the wound, Sakura felt her legs giving way under her. _Oh, shit. I used too much chakra. _

"Sakura! What's the situation?" The Godaime Hokage arrived just in time to see her young apprentice fall. "Are you okay?" She shook the exhausted medic.

Sakura murmured as she lost consciousness. "Sha…n…naro."


	2. Chapter 1

A/N Special thanks to everyone who reviewed! That's:

**WhatsALie**

**Maelynne Naveen**

**Dragostea**

**Norikoko**

**asuka02redeva**

Remember, reviews make the world go 'round. As opposed to elliptical, that is.

The disclaimer: _(Dun dun dunn) _I didn't own it, don't own it, and polka-dotted pigs will fly while I 'Kuchiyose: Edo Tensei' Yondaime and Obito back to life using random minor villains, when I do own it, just to make up for giving Kakashi-sensei a boo-boo.

Shoot me now for putting Kakashi, polka-dotted, and booboo in the same sentence…

Anyways, enjoy!

**Chapter 1**

_Shit, I'm here again?_

Yes, Hatake Kakashi, _the_ Copy ninja was 'here', at the hospital, the sterilized, whitewashed building he'd come to loathe so much. He tried to get up, but noticed the pain in his right leg. No, not just _noticed._ It would be better described as a cross between a screech and a yelp, a silent one, at that. He looked around the room, searching for anyone or anything that could possibly provide an explanation or a way out. Nothing. Dismayed, he tried to get up, but cringed at the pain again.

_It's not like I could walk, even if I could get up. God, I'm dizzy…must've been that damn dart. How the hell did it get through the armor? Well, guess I have to stay here. I wish Sakura was the nurse, and not some other third-rate medic shit trying to peek a look under my mask. Stupid excuse about my breathing, although again, if it was Sakura I wouldn't mind…_

He mentally kicked himself. He was her team leader, if not her friend. He definitely did not need anything to distract him on missions, and yet…

_If I'm starting to think that way, I'm probably suffering from fatigue, pain, or overall lack of Icha Icha, or a combination of the three. Or maybe it's too much Icha Icha. Idiot sennin just had to use the same name as Sakura for that particular…he'd be dead if Tsunade-sama ever reads volume 8, chapter 3. Common name, my ass, pink hair and green eyes are NOT common. Not that Sakura isn't constantly roaming around in my thoughts without the help…_

He kicked himself again for being such a pervert; but then again, the village already called him one. He was a bit miffed about that. So what if he liked the books? It wasn't like he was Jiraiya or Genma. His perversion was limited to the smut, and except for that and the eternal tardiness, he was a perfect gentleman. The fixation was not unlike the other shinobi's obsessions; looking down the long list from alcohol to peeping into bathhouses, he wondered why the shinobi gods didn't strike Konoha down with a lightning bolt.

He was only sick-minded, and it wasn't like his thoughts weren't based on truth. The twelve-year-old genin kid with a hopeless crush whose life he had been entrusted with, had grown up into a 'hot little piece of kunoichi', as Genma had previously noted in a group mission, and the silver-haired jounin had to admit, he was right. That however, didn't stop him from beating up his so-called friend.

_Fantasies about your student, no matter how former, aren't normal, _he chastised himself, _It's not normal. It's just wrong. Not allowed. Taboo._

He looked up at the ceiling and was reminded exactly why he hated hospitals, or at least one good reason; they never had any Icha Icha. The only literary item in the damn room was the workplace safety hazards manual and even that was on the other side of the room.

_Not that I'd read it anyways. It probably doesn't apply to a shinobi's line of work. Hmm, that would be interesting. To work as a ninja with no use of any sharp and potentially dangerous objects. Interesting indeed…_

He laughed quietly but realized the pain again. Admittedly, it was less agonizing than it was prior to whatever treatment he received last night, but the pain was still there, throbbing like a sore thumb.

_No, more like a sore thumb with senbon stuck in it, after being drenched in some sort of acid. Damn those darts. He got my own ninken to bite me, the same ones I trained since I was a goddamn three-year-old, with a mediocre drug…_

Indeed, he had been a child prodigy, and was a genius, but even genii had problems when they were severely injured. He wished that someone would come to clear things up. He could link together the facts and come up with a general idea of what happened, but he wanted the truth from someone who was there firsthand.

He hated the hospital and how it made him so vulnerable. He was damn pissed, more so to himself for being that vulnerable in the first place, although he knew that he was within Konoha walls in one of the safest buildings in the village, and that unless Orochimaru decided to revive himself somehow, and start up another war, he was quite safe. He yawned and wondered about the little shit that brought him here.

_Damn it, I'd kill him, whoever it was. Unless it was Sakura, of course. Then I'd…_

He was running out of punishments for his mind. He decided that since there wasn't anything that he could do, other than stare at the ceiling, he'd let himself sleep.

ЖЖЖ

Outside, Tsunade was reprimanding her 18-year-old apprentice. It was definitely not the first time that the pink-haired jounin had used up all her chakra while healing a patient, despite the numerous warnings.

_Even her recovery rate is a lot faster than normal. _This, she kept from her trainee for fear of encouraging her, although discouragement evidently didn't work on her anyways.

Still, chakra was the lifeblood of a shinobi, and unlike a certain would-be Hokage, Sakura never had an endless supply of it. This, however, did not stop her from acting like him, recklessly trying to save the ones close to her and never relenting before she was finished.

"How many times must I tell you this? A dead medic is a-"

"Liability to the team, I know, shishou. I just…Can I go see him?" Sakura didn't see why her teacher had to be so strict with the particular rule this time. She was within Konoha gates, not anywhere near dead, and with the knowledge that her mentor, still by far the best medic in town, was coming soon. She had broken other rules before, but she stopped herself from revealing them in her non-existent argument before she shot herself in the foot with things better left hidden. Things better left hidden, that is, if she wanted to live without murderous intents from those people involved, and with said people all being capable shinobi, Sakura wouldn't stand a chicken's chance on a battlefield if they were to gang up on her. They wouldn't kill her, at least if they had a head over their shoulders, what with the last Uchiha and the Kyuubi by her side no matter what. More like they couldn't. Sakura just wanted to love and be loved by everyone, regardless of the rules.

Tsunade sighed. She knew that Sakura tried to protect everyone close to her, more so after her parents' sudden death.

She also knew that the copy-nin had refused to receive treatment from any medic other than Sakura and herself, at least not when he was conscious. It wouldn't be abnormal, as they were the two best medics, if he wasn't so horrible to the other medics. He could render almost everyone in the damn village speechless, literally, just with a death glare. Of course, the Sharingan and its abilities may have helped, but he managed to make Ibiki flinch, a feat in and of itself. Seriously, the guy really had to lighten up and learn to trust others, but ever since that mask incident…well, to some extent, she felt sorry for the poor guy, Hotarou, who was assigned to help in the operation, key word being 'was'.

In the end, Sakura had to heal both of them, and even then, the poor chap had to be hospitalized longer than the infamous jounin. In the asylum for the mentally unstable, that is…

_He had a goddamn punctured lung! He wasn't even supposed to be able to breathe, let alone move!_

Hotarou did say that he was trying to remove the mask to allow for an open airway, but evidently, the copy-nin decided that it was an implausible excuse.

Somewhere in the village, Hotarou sneezed.

A loud exhale escaped her mouth again. "You're going to be healing him until his recovery anyways. I trust you will refrain from using up your chakra. Remember, there's the afternoon training and I won't heal you after that, so save it."

"Yes, shishou. Thank you!"

She was used to getting no healing after training and knew, from experience, to avoid all attacks that she wouldn't be able to heal during the battle. In other words, she had to avoid almost everything, from taijutsu to the rare ninjutsu and genjutsu that the Fifth used. The evasion training was working; she could last at least five minutes without a hit, in a serious spar with the slug princess, with little chakra to her feet to aid her speed. She wasn't worried; the Fifth never used an attack during sparring that she could not heal. If the injury was life threatening, she would get healed by the best of the best, regardless of what was said and done. No, she had better things to worry about. She hoped for the best for her former teacher, as she ran towards room 145, ward 3.

A/N: Sorry about the late update . Seems like Good Friday's being good to me and I can finally upload something. Stupid school project…


	3. Chapter 2

Yes, I'm feeling a bit woozy from writing so much in a day…why do my holidays never turn out like holidays…not that I didn't enjoy writing this…

Reviews and Favs are the single neutrons that cause radioactive chain reactions to Uranium molecules to make a whole lot of energy…

Chem. midterms are getting to my head…

The disclaimer: Think of it this way, if I did own it, Kakashi Gaiden would be out in anime from constant nagging and threats…although that could happen anyways without me actually owning the series…whatever, I don't own it. Don't sue me.

Bon Appetit!

**Chapter 2**

Sakura ran into the room, hardly stopping to close the sliding door labeled 145, and saw him on the clean white bed. At least, what used to be a clean white bed if hospital standards hadn't been changed. The 'clean' white bed that was the minimal treatment for most of the overnight patients was stained crimson red in the lower right corner.

Holding back the grimace, she got to work on the reopened wound immediately, using a blank scroll, a myriad of hand seals, and some intricate brushwork.

_Where's that insolent artsy bastard when you need him? _She thought as she tried to write out the complicated kanji by memory. Closing her eye over the slight mistakes and suppressing her perfectionist side for once, she cut off a snippet of hair from the tip of the lopsided mess he called hair, and brought it to the leg-wound.

She looked at the unsightly wound with dismay. It had opened up again and would be painful when the jounin awoke. She mentally patted herself on the back for healing the bones yesterday. She checked over the wound and healed the main leg muscles to the point where there shouldn't be constant throbbing.

_Wouldn't, _she corrected herself,_ I'm not the second-best medic in the village, for nothing!_

While effective, this form of healing was extremely complex and Sakura only knew how to heal the main muscles without a full medic team with back up. She stitched the wound up, manually this time, making the tiniest stitches. He hardly twitched.

_Better tell Moegi to work on closing up wounds. Ebisu's brats aren't getting enough injuries for Moegi to practice her medical jutsu. Even so, I should have been able to fix it when I looked it over. _

She knew she was being too harsh on herself, knowing that bone injuries, whether they were fractures or full cracks extending to the marrow, were hardest to heal. Heck, she was surprised that she had actually finished healing the cracked tibia by herself, after her shift at the hospital, and when shinobi were low on chakra…people tended to make questionable decisions and actions. She felt like she wanted to put the blame on someone.

_Damn Chuunin who carried him…looked like he couldn't carry a stretcher properly without shaking all over, if his life depended on it…it's like he'd never seen a patient before. I swear, either he's got hemophobia, or he's just scared of ANBU…_

Somewhere in the village, Hotarou sneezed. Again.

She decided to heal the rest when he woke up because she didn't want to interfere with the body's normal healing too much and there really wasn't much she could do except alleviate pain. She rolled the scrolls up and decided to just rest a bit, at least until her former teacher awoke.

_He looks so peaceful when he's sleeping._

_**Psh, peaceful? That's what you think? I'm telling you, he's H-O-T, HAWT!**_

Sakura tried to ignore it. _Is that all you think about? _

_**Touché. But that doesn't change the fact that he's hotter than anyone else you know. Why don't you admit it?**_

_He's supposed to be in good shape, being a shinobi, and all. Why am I debating against my inner self? Where's that other one, the nagging one that always tags along?_

_**Beats me. Good riddance, if you ask me.**_

_No one asked._

_**So cold, and towards yourself too… Sakura, you're turning out to be like that emo ice-cube of a guy, the one you brought back half dead, with the infuriatingly exasperating excuse for a ninja.**_

_Excuse me? They're my friends. You do NOT talk like that about my friends. The ice-cube just so happens to be the very last remaining Uchiha who is trying his best to melt the ice, and the excuse is who no doubt will be the future Hokage. I'm just…_

_**Just what?**_

_Lucky to be with them and I won't tolerate you insulting them._

…_**well, technically, you can't really do much.**_

_Technically, you are me, so they're your friends too…Why can't you be nice to friends for a change?_

_Stop fighting. We cannot have such disturbance among spirits that share a common body._

_Heh, well now you're here too. Join the party. Hypocrite._

_**Still, I'm telling you. What part of HOT don't you understand? Let's see, he's sexy, hot, strong, mysterious…**_

Sakura decided to ignore the rambling voice that sounded kind of like Ino on one of her rants, and wait for her patient to wake. Leaning over the edge of the bed, she stared at the trademark mask. She did wonder what he looked like. A halting hand hovered towards the piece of cloth when her conscience stopped her.

_You are not supposed to do that. He would not like it._

_**Bah, humbug. Like you care anyways. Go on, I'm curious.**_

_Remember what happened to Higuchi-san when he tried?_

_**Yeah, but it's Sakura, here. She ain't some random medic. He's known her through most of her shinobi-life.**_

_True, but it might have to do with reflex, and-_

_**Reflex my ass! He hardly moved when he was getting stitched up.**_

_I hate it when you guys fight, but I guess it's better than you fighting me…_

It wasn't hard to figure out why they did fight. One was uptight while the other was…similar to Tsunade or Ino when they were drunk. They were worse than Naruto and Sasuke when it came to fighting, and _that_ was saying a lot. One would think that they'd have matured a bit more after the fight and what happened, but she wouldn't have them any other way. At least that's what her heart told her. Her sanity was a different matter altogether.

The real mystery was the fact that they were there in the first place. The whole conscience thing was new. She imagined that it looked like her mother and acted like Lee. She decided she didn't like the combination.

Her hand retreated as she shook away the thought and studied the covered face. It seemed normal enough, with no telltale indentations or bulges. She sighed. She wouldn't stoop to Naruto's level by trying to peek at Kakashi-sensei's face when he was unconscious. Besides, being the genius he was, he most likely would find out.

_Hell, he probably has it booby-trapped._

_It is not pleasant to say such things about others behind their back._

_**Shannaro! Doesn't matter! You know you want to look.**_

_Shut. Up. Now. Or else. _She didn't know of anything she could do to possibly harm them without harming herself, but she was pissed. She just wanted to threaten them, to somehow get them to shut up. She was just damn tired, physically and mentally. The voices finally realized this and withdrew. She let her head drop to the bed.

_I'll just wait until Kakashi-sensei wakes up so I can tell shishou. Just like this. God, the bed's so nice and soft, like a cloud. I guess rest and sleep really are the best nurses. Maybe I really should live in the hospital, like Naruto said…_

Her eyelids gently closed as her shoulders slumped, drifting off into peaceful slumber.

A/N: Yes, by now, I realize that most of the chapters end with Sakura floating off to dreamworld, but what can I say? I'm not too good at endings. Don't worry, she'll be a bit less fatigued in later chapters.

I also realize that Bon Appetit is a French term used mainly by a chef or a waiter before the diner dines, but I really don't care. Heck, I just wanted to say it. I hope no one misunderstood that and ate the words…


	4. Chapter 3

The disclaimer: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and Spam; egg bacon and Spam; egg bacon sausage and Spam; I don't own Naruto; Spam bacon sausage and Spam; Spam egg Spam Spam bacon and Spam; Don't sue me; Spam sausage Spam Spam bacon Spam tomato and Spam;…

It's getting to my head. I didn't want to be a barber; I wanted to be a lumberjack…

Ok, maybe the Monty Python marathon wasn't such a bright idea.

(goes off humming 'Always Look on the Bright Side of Life')

Chapter 3 

The March sunlight flickered through the window onto the copy-nin's eyes. They opened to witness a tangled mess of hair beside him; pink hair to be exact.

_Sakura? How long was I out?_ He mused. The pain was somewhat bearable now, and he could move his legs without feeling as if a swordfish impaled him several times. However, he felt (and reeked) like he was impaled into a swordfish, or at least into a highly sterilized but not deodorized…thing… He wanted to leave for good, but stopped as pink caught his eyes again.

_Why is she here? Right, I'm in the hospital, and she's a medic. Put two and two together, Hatake, and stop thinking like a genin. You're ANBU for god's sake._

He glanced towards the sleeping kunoichi. There was no doubt now that she was the one who healed him. Every good medic, or at least every one of them he voluntarily asked treatment from (a total of three people in the course of his life), it seemed, had a different way of healing.

Sakura got rid of the pain, then tried to heal the parts of the wound that a shinobi would regard most important, mainly the bones and muscles that controlled movement. Tsunade treated her patients with medically biased priorities, but allowed room for pain. Chakra-based painkilling used up chakra and stamina immensely, and the injection variety imported from Snow, despite the discounts given at the expense of one grateful, and particularly generous Snow princess, was less effective and expensive.

_Sakura…reminds me of Rin…_

He pushed the memories away and slid into his pillow, trying to keep them from sprouting through the metaphorical wall he had built between himself and the world.

The said figurative wall enclosed emotions as well. Although he had known and practiced the shinobi rules since before he could reach the top of the counter at Ichiraku's on tiptoe, and knew by heart, #25, the one about emotions, where it says not to display them, it was getting increasingly more difficult to do so especially with her right beside him.

Speaking of whom, the pink mass shifted to reveal tired sea-green eyes that opened wide when she realized that her patient was conscious.

ЖЖЖ

"Kakashi-sensei? You're awake? When did you-" she rubbed her eyes and yawned, the fatigue not yet gone from her from her depletion last night and her exertion in healing prior to her falling asleep, despite her recovery rate that almost rivaled her mentor's, and said mentor's treatment.

"You could have woken me up, you know. Then I could have healed you faster, so that I'd have had more time before I had to go and-" she rambled as she glanced at the clock. Suffice to say, she nearly jumped out of her skin when she did.

_Aw crap! I'm late! She'll totally kill me!_

_Such language!_

_**Meh, not like she's wrong.**_

_Not the time. SO not the time to be sitting here arguing. Shannaro!_

She ran over to the window and opened it, letting in the warm spring breeze.

"I have to go. I'm late." She fumbled around with the mesh screen, meant to keep patients in and pests out. Apparently it kept Sakura in too.

"Sakura, what happened?"

_Direct, and to the point, as always._

"Shishou'll tell you, when she gets here, which is in five seconds to kill me if I don't get there now!" _Damn net-thingy, stupid, stupid, hospital regulations. Seriously, a bug won't really do that much more to a patient who's already sick. Shishou won't just kill me…I feel so guilty, and I was the one who asked her about extra training as well. Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it, damn-_

"Can't you just tell me?" her patient interrupted.

"Yes, but now, I have to _go_, and unlike _someone_ I know, _sensei_," Sakura hinted, "people do mind a lot when I'm late."

A chakra-laden fist punched through the exasperating piece of mesh.

_**You go, girl! **_Inner Sakura pumped her fist into the air.

She paused, one foot already out the window.

ЖЖЖ

"Kakashi-sensei,"

"Yo, still here. I still find it reasonable for-" He stopped himself as he noticed the vein throb on her head and the gloves going to their respective places on her hands, and decided that the smartest thing now would be to shut the hell up. At least until he was less…incapacitated, and she, more willing to just sit down and negotiate the situation.

"Aah, nevermind. Go on." Kakashi didn't feel like being on the receiving end of her insane strength, looking towards what used to be an effective measure against bugs.

"If I come back to find this room empty," Sakura went on with a voice too sugary sweet for a threat, "I swear, I will hunt you down and-"

Kakashi yawned as she continued her threat, her many threats, to be more precise.

_Another trait from the Fifth…I guess I'll have to just sit here and wait._ _I hope she doesn't take up gambling as well._

"And after that-"

He nodded and cut her off. "Whatever you say, _Ohimesama_. By the way, don't you have to go and visit a certain princess?"

_A certain pissed off princess…_

ЖЖЖ

"Oh Shit!" Sakura yelled as she fell out of the building. She quickly regained her balance. She stopped at the window and gave him a sharp glare.

_He probably will drag his sorry ass out of the hospital, through Konoha to his apartment, regardless. He isn't legendary for nothing, although I hope he'd stop trying to get out without telling m-anyone._

_**Told ya, you like him.**_

_Yeah, you don't have to rub it in. I'm not stupid. _She focused on getting to the Hokage tower, sulking about the imminent punishment.

ЖЖЖ

He sighed, knowing too well that he'd have to stay, for once, at the dreaded building if he ever wanted to so much as walk again. He also wanted to know exactly what had happened to him, but he knew that curiosity and temporary physical handicaps had failed to stop his escapes in the past. It probably was Sakura who made him stay willingly for once, although he hated to admit it.

_Sakura…she did heal me, I'm sure. No one else would be good enough…or nice enough to use that much painkiller. _He added the last bit, remembering the slug princess's role in the medical field._ If she didn't, I guess I'll have a…pleasant talk with Tsunade-sama…_

Combine two live sannin with some nice blackmail, and soon you'll find yourself getting whatever you want from the village. Getting the kunoichi of the Legendary Three to let no medic so much as touch him, with the exception of her and Sakura, was a piece of cake. Being the main source of money for them both, in their own respective ways had also helped him make his life somewhat easier.

By now, he was sure that it _was_ Sakura. His mask was on the same way as it always was, and the minute seals were still attached to the rim of the mask, though barely visible. He didn't _want_ to endanger or hospitalize more medics. It was more trouble than they were worth for the paperwork and money involved. It also had nothing to do with the fact that Sakura had once subtly complained about staying around healing her subordinates. Subtly, mind you, but he got the point.

He stretched, feeling stiff and out of shape. He was well aware that most patients were expected to stay in their beds until their discharge, but hell, he didn't stay in the _building _if he could help it. He doubted that anyone would really mind the minor details of where he was relative to the piece of furniture if he just stayed in the _room_ for once.

_Sakura never did tell me to stay in bed, now did she?_

He couldn't tell what day it was, but decided that he'd sat around far too long, and started to mentally count the improvised one fingered, one legged push-ups.

_1…2…3…_

A/N: I know, my author notes are getting exceedingly weird…and food-like…

Sorry if I made anyone hungry. :P


	5. Chapter 4

I'm sorry I haven't updated in the longest time.

"I have been sick as a dog for the last fortnight. I had caught cold in spite of the eighteen degrees centigrade, the roses, the orange trees, the palms, and the fig trees. Three doctors-the most celebrated on the island-examined me. The first said I was going to die, the second that I was actually dying, the third that I was dead already…I am myself again. But my illness was unfavorable to the Preludes which will reach you God knows when…"

F. Chopin

Yeah…what he said…'cept substitute 'Preludes' with 'chapters'

So much for my resolution, huh? see reviews 

The disclaimer: I don't think I own Naruto, or any other character, for that matter…not that I know of…well, if I did own it and didn't know, that would be kinda sad…

I only own Soroni…who's a character I made…which is also conveniently my pen name…

Right…

Should I have character death in this fanfic? I tried to stop myself from killing anyone off except Orochimaru (sorry, oro-fans) and he dies anyways in the manga…even if it is a bit sketchy…

Come on, sure, he has an implied tragic past, but heck, half the population of the Naruto world probably does…yes, even Kabuto…even him…

That, and he's accountable for (correct me if I'm wrong) at least an eighth of the aforementioned tragic pasts.

Should I get Sasuke to get rid of Itachi? I mean sure, he's hot but he probably will die in the actual plotline…shot by Itachi-fangirls

People have _strange_ fetishes for major villains…

I don't feel like getting rid of Asuma in this fic, though…cuz then I'd feel bad for Kurenai, and I don't want Shikamaru to become a smoker…should I get rid of him?

Anyhoo, reader responses would be greatly appreciated.

If anyone sees any mistakes, whether it is grammatical, technical, or informational (yes, that _is_ a word), would he/she/it (ya never know) please send it via email and not thru the reviews? Thanks. I'm weird like that…

Yeah, helluva A/N, eh? On wit' da show!

(dun dun dunnnnnn…)

**Chapter 4**

Sakura poof-ed off to the Hokage Tower to find her shishou singing what seemed to be a very off-key drinking song. She searched around for Shizune, but she, along with Ton-Ton, was nowhere to be found.

"Hey, Sakura! Sakura-chan, get me some hic sake!"

"No, shishou, you've already had enough." she sighed, and then panicked.

_She probably found all the bottles we've been hiding…shit… damnit…Shizune wouldn't…_

"Sakura, Shizune hic told me that you were the one who hid all these bottles. Now, my favorite little hic kunoichi wouldn't do that huh? No she wouldn't…"

…_Shizune, that traitor…how the hell does shishou sound so threatening anyways when she's totally wasted?_

_Now, that is not nice of you to insult them like that_

_It's true, though_

_**Who cares about that? Free booze!**_

…_No help at all, as usual…_

"O..of course not, shishou! Why would I do such a thing?"

"Don't know…Want some?" she slurred.

_**Free booze I tell ya, FREE! It's just right there for you to take and even after she offers it-**_

_Just…shut it. No, I will not take the booze even if you start singing that insane drinking song. I have it enough outside of my head without my own inner self singing it too. _

_**Hmm, that's actually a very good idea…**_

_Watch it. I've already done my random act of kindness for the week. I might go insane…_

_**Win-win situation for me. I get to watch you get either drunk or insane. **_Inner Sakura cackled and rubbed her palms maliciously.

_Just…shut up. _She made a mental note not to give her inner self more ideas as she pondered about who would be the worst to listen to: her shishou, her sadistic Inner self, or her drunken self. She realized that she couldn't know, mainly because she was never intoxicated enough to sing like that and if she ever were drunk, she probably wouldn't remember it anyways. She pushed the thoughts out and left her mentor, inebriated as she was.

_God, if I stay here any longer, I think I'm really going to go crazy…Guess I'll just have to tell sensei what happened, myself. _

She sighed and did the necessary hand seals.

She poof-ed back to find Kakashi doing push-ups on the floor.

"Sensei, what the hell are you doing?"

"…85…86…87"

"You're going to open up the wound again! How long were you down there?"

_How did he get down there in the first place?_

_**Shinobi.**_The two voices replied, simultaneously.

_Right. I knew that._

But then again, how could she not know? It was what, simply put, described her lifestyle.

"…91…92…93"

Arms crossed in front, she decided to leave it as it was because hell, she wasn't arguing. He actually stayed in the building for once.

_There's a first for everything…_

She hoped this would be more or less regular, and that he'd stay at the hospital from time to time without having to be unconscious.

_**That's 'cause you like him.**_

_Shut up. I am so not in love with my former teacher…_

_**I never said you were in love with him, I said-**_

_I said shut up._

"Ohayo to you too, Sakura. Back so soon. Did you miss me?" he glanced at her from the floor where he was sitting. He knew that he was in no situation to get her mad, but he had finished his 100 one-finger push-ups each, on all ten fingers and was now officially damn bored. He apparently caught her off guard as she stumbled backwards, breaking out of her trance.

"Don't flatter yourself, Kakashi-sensei," she smoothed out her medic uniform and cleared her throat, "Tsunade-shishou's…unfortunately not available for the moment…and Shizune-senpai…has an unexplained absence." She sighed, pulling out a pencil and picking up her clipboard.

"So…what happened before you ended up as a mess?"

A/N: I'm sorry again that I didn't update for so long.

Please! No, not the gophers!!! AAAAAAaaaafgfhmngh…

Right…

Reviews are greatly appreciated!


	6. Chapter 5

Right…

I have no excuse for this fic to be late except to read all of those wonderful fanfics out there. Some of them were discontinued though...which made me sad...so I've decided that I should really think up how to end this before it gets to that point. I still have to work out the details but I have a faint idea of how it will work. In order for it to work, I changed around the chapters, editing them and fixing the stuff that ppl e-mailed me about. hint, hint, nudge, nudge 

The disclaimer: Come to think of it, I never did own Naruto…did I? I dunno. You tell me. I don't think I've ever really owned anything. What does it mean to own something? What is this own that you speak of? Huh? Whaa?

I've gone from the state of denial to the state of confusion. Going past the border on the highway, I must've lost a bit more than a few loose change…maybe some of that gray stuff in the thing called the head…

Enjoy!

**Chapter 5**

_She always turns so intellectual when she's nervous…so…wordy and long-winded…speaking of long, her legs-_

She tapped the pencil, implying that she wanted an answer sometime within the decade. He tore his gaze from her when he found himself staring, and realized that she'd asked him a question.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?"

crack _Well, there goes the pencil. I really should stop treating people like Gai, although I would never stare at him like-_

"I _said _what happened? Before I got there of course."

_So it was her. Thought so._

"If I tell, you tell me what happened afterwards." He finally said.

"Deal, but you go first." She grinned.

ЖЖЖ

"Right, I went, I saw, I conquered…then I was ambushed on my way back," he added, almost as an afterthought.

_Ambiguous as always…_ She sighed and chewed her pencil.

He continued, as if reading her mind. "Around twenty or so shinobi, all chuunin level, except one jounin. It was stupid of them to try to take on an ANBU operative, and in broad daylight too. I was near the village, actually, when it happened. One shot me with a poison dart and the leg wound was from when they drugged one of my ninken."

ЖЖЖ

"Finished mission, then ambush. Twenty shinobi…no survivors." She intoned as she wrote, raising an eyebrow as if asking for verification. He smirked at her guess, partly because it _was _right and partly because she _guessed _it right, but more so because _she_ guessed it right.

_So my favorite kunoichi does know me well…wait a sec, since when was she my favorite…_

"…Mist nins, if their poison is any indication." Sakura knew better than to ask for more information; ANBU missions were always confidential.

_Sakura, my favorite kunoichi…does have a nice ring to it …_

"Your turn." Kakashi said, impatiently.

"Long story short, Konohamaru and Udon found you at the gate, half dead, with minor contusions and incisions, that leg wound, and the toxicant-"

"In the vernacular, please?" he interrupted, putting on his best eye-crease.

_There is really no point in her talking if I can't understand half of it. Not like I don't mind listening to her voice…_

It seemed that whatever was punishing him mentally earlier had stopped or gotten liberal, for his mind's drift towards a certain female medic was becoming more and more...extensive, and without interruptions. He had to admit, he was pushing it.

Sakura rolled her eyes and continued, "As I was saying, Moegi kept you alive 'til I got there and got rid of most of the poison, minor stuff, etc. Oh yeah, I healed your leg so that you wouldn't wake up to blazing agony, but then I ran out of chakra, and had to get hospitalized myself. Not exactly the first time that happened. But the antidote didn't get rid of all the poison, so you probably will have a fever, unless you already have one. Speaking of which…" The ANBU operative flinched slightly at her touch, but she merely scowled, apparently noticing the heat more than the movement.

She sighed, "That's why you aren't supposed to do any training in the hospital. I can't tell if it's a fever or if it's just you sweating. I swear, what's up with all you guys? Every time Lee-san gets hospitalized, he reopens his wounds so many times, and he won't get it through his bowl cut that the cleaning lady seriously does not like cleaning up pools of blood and sweat, but then he's never gotten much through that anyways. He's maddening enough to justify homicide. It's always youth, youth, and youth. And that bowl cut." she shivered, "Speaking of hair, I used your hair for the medium for the healing. Just a bit, though, off the top…

"Sa-" Kakashi couldn't make head or tail of what she was saying, and she was rambling again. If _this_ was the long story short, he really didn't want to hear the original long, although that part about Gai's protégé was true, and he was glad that she used the honorific, knowing that the three-letter-add-on kept Green beast jr. an acquaintance, if not less.

He also couldn't get a word in edgewise; she just kept on talking

_If we were lovers, I'm supposed to kiss her to shut her up right? Wait, why am I thinking about stuff like this?_

"…but, seriously, if it is a fever, I can't really help you on that, because it's the body's own mechanism for getting rid of foreign materials, and it would interrupt the immune system. Your leg still needs time for recovery. I didn't get enough time to heal it completely and then I have to make sure that the cells are recovering the way they're supposed to." she finally stopped, appearing to be quite out of breath.

"I see," he lied, "So how long do I have to stay here?"

"You'll be able to walk after I finish healing you now, but you still need rest for the poison. I'd say about a week or so. But then, I shouldn't think that it would matter how long you _have_ to stay here. We are both intelligent people. You'll probably be out of here as soon as your leg is healed."

_Smart girl…no not girl, woman…_

He groaned inwardly as he caught himself again, mostly because he had yet another reminder of how…mature she was.

"Yes, indeed, we are both intelligent people," _But I could try to get out even faster _"What do you want in return for, say, getting me to my house and healing me?"

A/N: ooooh, my first real cliff-hanger…

…

…or rather my first use-of-a-procrastinational-tactic-just-because-I-have-yet-to-figure-out-how-exactly-they-would-get-out-of-the-hospital-even-with-Shizune-and-Tsunade-not…really-there-to-stop-them…

Meh, I'll figure it out all in good time…I know basically what happens but w/e…I'll wing it somehow

Anyhoo, for all of those people who were waiting patiently every week because I said that I'd be posting once a week, I'm so very sorry. I was editing the previous chapters and trying to figure out the way that I should be progressing with this story...

Gomen...

Well, to be completely honest, I was also watching my fair share of Naruto and Bleach...

...and now I know that I should try to follow what I said I'd do, if I didn't want people to feel like I felt when the Naruto manga didn't come out that one week!

We all friends, riiight?


	7. Chapter 6

YAY! It's in! Before the week is up! Now I can escape this accursed prison once and for all(?)! W00t!

Right...ahem...

Should the chapters be longer than they are? Maybe I'm just being a self-conscious teenage girl but seriously, are they too choppy?

The disclaimer: Confucious say I don't own it. I've done some deep thinking and meditation (while drinking herbal tea) for the past week, trying to get out of the state of confusion. Must have kinda jumped into the state of confucianism. Not much but still an improvement.

**Chapter 6**

Sakura pondered over this. It was certainly unusual for him to actually ask for help, but she shrugged the suspicions aside. She wanted something in return for saving him last night (and helping him out of the hospital, if she managed to do it), although it wasn't like she didn't want to save him. She _was_ ordered by the Hokage to heal him, and she didn't really care where it was done, as long as it _was_ done properly.

"I'll heal you at your place if you teach me some ninjutsu afterwards." She decided that since the Fifth Hokage was so inebriated, she'd need someone to train with, and who better than 'Copy Ninja Kakashi of 1000 jutsu'.

This would also give her a chance to figure out his address.

_**Told ya. You loooooove him.**_

_No one asked you._

_**So you do admit that you are attracted to him. **_Her inner cackled maliciously.

_Mind your own business._

_**But the point is, it is my business. Come on, you finally know it too.**_

_Shut up._

"Alright. Any plans on how to get me out?"

"I…don't know…"

"I thought you'd help me out."

"You've probably gotten out of the hospital several _hundreds _of times, 'kashi-sensei. I said I'd help, not do all the work."

"…"

"…"

"That _is _true…" he said, pondering on the concept.

"Huh?"

"No, I meant the number of times I've gotten out of the hospital...more like out of, though."

"What? How old _are_ you anyways, forty?"

Kakashi glared at his former student. It wasn't like her to mess around with him, even if she knew that no harm would come from him.

ЖЖЖ

"Hai, hai. Silver, not gray."

She did know him too well.

"Twenty-six." he lied. He was no saint either, though.

"Sensei, that 'thirty-two' sounded suspiciously like a 'twenty-six', which, by the way, you _were_ six years ago. I'm eighteen now, not twelve."

_As if I need yet another reminder…_

"Why'd you ask for my age if you already knew it?

_How does she know my age, anyway? Right. Medic nin, medical records which are probably on that clipboard now. Damn it, it's blocking my view..._

He felt his conscience disown him. It was saddening but he enjoyed the benefits nonetheless. It was a wonder why it had been with him. He figured it had to do with the fact that the kunoichi that he was shamelessly, albeit covertly (He didn't have a death-wish, thank you very much) ogling had been his student.

_Something to do with taboo, maybe._

"No…it just felt like you've come to the hospital way more times than me, and I _work_ here."

"…well, I _was_ doing A-ranked solos since I was 14."

ЖЖЖ

"…"

"…"

"…whoa…that's awfully young to be doing A-missions." Sakura's jaw dropped dangerously close to the ground.

_Meh, I'll ask him more stuff later…_

_**Yeah! Later at his house if everything works out!**_

_You guys do not even have a plan. Nothing can 'work out' if there is nothing TO 'work out'._

_**Well now, you seem to want to go there so bad. Why don't you come up with a plan?**_

_Not the time…but then again, when is it ever a good time for these two to be arguing?_

_We are not arguing. We are having a formal debate. At least I am._

_Riiiiiight. I SO believe you. Hypocritical ass._

She was beginning to think that her conscience was not turning out to be as much of a 'goody-two-shoes' as she'd originally thought.

_**Hmm…when you're trying to figure out whether you love your teacher or not?**_

_He's my FORMER sensei._

_**So we have made progress. You totally love him. Yo, conscience, get back down here! She's finally figured it out. Shannaro!**_

_No, by former, i meant that...oh, nevermind. Just be quiet._

_Frankly dear, I don't give a damn._

_**BE that way, you and your little books, and your little films, and-**_

_I will have you know, it is one of the best-_

_SHUT UP!_

"What's so unusual? You had an S-class when you were 14."

"But that was different. It was _the_ Kazekage no Suna, first of all. Just dealing with him may count as an S-class in and of itself, although he has changed from what he was six years ago…anyways, I had Naruto and you and...Chiyo baa-sama. I was just…"

"The person who, with her insane strength, busted open the boulder to actually get to Gaara?"

"Team Gai got rid of the barrier."

"You still beat your Akatsuki. If memory serves, he was the stronger of the two."

"It was mainly Chiyo baa-sama that guided me and it wasn't quite right at the end. It looked like he wanted to die. And Chiyo baa-sama did die."

"They made their own choices. Don't kill yourself over it."

"What do you know about other people killing themselves or-" she blurted out, then realized what she'd just said, and clasped her hand over her mouth. She didn't know the real story behind his Sharingan or anything else about him, for that matter, but she knew from the one fact that he visited the memorial religiously that he had loved and lost.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean what I said. Forget that I said anything. I-"

"It's okay, Sakura. I'll…tell you…some other time…"

_He's always so full of secrets…_

_**That's what you love about him, too.**_

_It is true. You do have a fixation towards mysteries._

_**Like that heartthrob of an Uchiha!**_

_Oh, shut up. I make a perfectly normal comment and you lump my friends into it._

**_I'm sure that you want to be more than just friends, though..._**

He sighed, _"_How do you think I feel about that whole misson? I lost my cool at just the sight of Itachi, let my Akatsuki, the weaker of the two, get away, lost consciousness, got carried by Gai, of all people, had to be hospitalized with a warning not to use my eye like I did, and missed out on meeting our friend, Sasuke-kun, when, if I remember correctly, he tried to kill you."

"He's...less homicidal, but Sasuke's Sasuke.

He noted the absence of the 'kun' that usually adorned the absolute last Uchiha's name.

"Well, any bright ideas on how to get out of here?" Kakashi changed the topic, scratching the back of his head.

"God, don't you have a teleportation scroll to your house, or something?"

"No, I'm not God, and no, I didn't think I'd need one."

"Any jutsu?" she suggested, ignoring his retort, and suppressing one of her own.

"Nothing especially to get out."

"How did you do it before?"

"I can't do it now, mostly because of the poison but also because of this leg."

"Yeah, you have a fever, which is probably messing up your chakra system, and the poison's still there. Damn…why don't you just stay here until you've healed?"

Kakashi glowered at his former student in a way that said 'Hell no'. It was amazing how much emotion a single eye could convey.

_**So THAT'S why he didn't go off this time. It's not that he didn't, rather, he couldn't.**_

…_shut up._

_**Ooh, aren't we a little touchy…**_

Sakura ignored Inner Sakura and tried to brainstorm ideas for the getaway. She smacked her head.

_Why didn't I think of that before? But should I tell him? He wouldn't run away, and I know for sure that he wouldn't abandon me, here. I still remember that whole 'I'll protect you guys even if it takes my life' spiel? But then…he likes his privacy…but he wouldn't just run off, either. The effects run out in a few hours and he'd need someone to heal him…_

"Well…I _do_ have a way to get out…"

A/N: ANOTHER CLIFFIE!!!

Err...hehe...sorry?

Kinda thinking of inserting random people to visit just before they leave…

Like Naruto or Sasuke. Random nurses. Gai maybe.

Iunno…


End file.
